What is our emotional management like during the pandemic? For more than a year now, we have been experiencing an exceptional situation, a global health crisis due to the COVID-19 pandemic . Today I would like to share with you some reflections on how to manage emotions during the pandemic.
Emotional management during the pandemic
In recent months I have heard on many occasions in coaching processes with clients to whom I accompany situations similar to the following:
“At the beginning of the confinement I was doing well, during the first weeks I was almost happy to have more time to spend with my family, so as not to do so many things. Then the months have gone by and I have it getting worse and worse.
Now I realize that I have changed. Before the pandemic I would arrive at the office and waste energy, everyone told me that I was already at full strength from the morning, wanting to do things,…
Now I realize that I am more apathetic, I don’t feel like volunteering to do things, it is more difficult for me.
The others don’t notice, not my boss, (his feedback is still very good), not my colleagues…
But I notice that I have less desire and I don’t like it, I don’t want to be like this, I want to go back to being the one I was before…”
Managing emotions during the pandemic
How familiar are these thoughts to us?
It is very interesting to stop and observe how we feel, how we are in situations.
This “stopping” allows us to increase our self-knowledge, listening to our body and identifying our emotions, whether they are fear, anger, tiredness, frustration, anxiety, etc.
Self-care
Now, in addition to stopping, observing ourselves and listening to our body:
What am I going to do with what I observe?
It is not the same to manage change when I choose that change than when it is imposed on us from outside.
But the phases of this process of “loss”, in this case of “loss of control over the situation” are similar to the phases of grief, as we already know, (denial, anger, negotiation/guilt, sadness and acceptance).
Faced with this thought: “My body tells me that I am tired, that I am sad, but I don’t want to be like this”:
What is the level of self-demand I have with myself?
How much do I listen to my body and allow myself to relax?
How do I show myself that I take care of myself?
What things are really important to me right now, and where do I want to focus my energies?
Maybe now my body is asking me to focus more on myself, on what is essential for me, on what fills me with energy, love and strength.
What really happens if I’m not as productive?
How much am I willing to lower my level of demand and not be at 100%?
Caring for the people on my team
In this situation we observe that there are people who are more vulnerable on a physical level and this situation has affected them on a health level and in many cases we also have to face situations of loss of loved ones and the grief that this entails.
But there are also people who are more emotionally vulnerable in this situation and who are suffering the consequences to a greater or lesser extent with increases in fears, phobias, anxieties, disorders, etc.
As team leaders I would like to share a reflection that my mentor,
Marta Williams,
passed on to me some time ago, considered by many as the mother of executive coaching in Spain, back in the 80s, and with whom I am lucky enough to work. She says, paraphrasing
Peter Drucker
: “Good leaders are like sponges. They have the ability to absorb uncertainty so that others can work.”
At this time talking about that self-care, not only of ourselves, but also of our people, in the teams:
How does each of the people on my team really feel?
What can I do to accompany you in this situation? What level of care do I want to give to each one in that situation?
How can I give them more certainty in the current situation?
What level of productivity do I want on my team now? How much am I willing to relax the demand with my team?
Keys to dealing with emotions during the pandemic
As psychologist Patricia Ramírez says, I believe that one of the keys to facing this situation is hope. Hope comes from the Latin “esperare”, so to have hope means “to wait for solutions”.
Not losing hope prevents us from falling into discouragement.
When we lose hope, we stop getting involved in our goal, we lose interest, and we don’t use the creativity that the situation requires.
It is one of the strengths that help the most in times of emotional vulnerability, along with optimism, social skills or perseverance, for example.
Some authors such as
Martin Seligman,
one of the fathers of positive psychology, have investigated why people in adverse situations are able to compose themselves and maintain that positive attitude and continue to smile.
7 TOOLS FOR EMOTIONAL MANAGEMENT DURING THE PANDEMIC
1. Focus on the positive and be thankful
You can focus on what you have and not what you lack.
At the end of the day, make a list of at least 5 things you can be grateful for that day.
They don’t have to be great feats, it can be anything from a conversation with a loved one, to a walk or a good breakfast.
Registering the positive makes you focus your attention on that.
2. Talk about how you feel
Externalize your emotions and feelings with someone you trust or write in a journal what you feel, so that you can externalize and express it as it helps you the most.
If possible, share time with positive people, those who raise your energy, (I call them “nurturing people”).
Ask for help if you need it. Feeling heard helps you to keep your spirits high.
3. Look for challenges that motivate you and depend on you
Speaking of change management, focus on what you can control, on what does depend on you, (minimizing general uncertainty). In this way you are the protagonist of the process, you change your role and you are not a victim of the situation.
4. Increases positive stimuli and limits negative ones
to. Decide how much time a day you are going to listen to news or figures about the pandemic, for example.
b. Choose to read books, magazines, or watch movies or TV on topics that are positive to you, that generate pleasant emotions.
5. Practice humor
Enjoy comedies, monologues.
Laughter is a good antidote in these situations as it releases dopamine in the brain and limits the production of cortisol (which is the hormone responsible for stress).
6. Engage in selfless activities
Spend time on charitable activities, such as talking on the phone with elderly people, bringing food to neighbors in need, etc.
When you work on your altruism, your level of well-being improves, you feel better about yourself.
7. Practice healthy habits
Eat healthy food, exercise frequently and practice daily meditation.
ACTION PLAN FOR EMOTIONAL MANAGEMENT DURING THE PANDEMIC
I suggest that you take pen and paper and write down two ideas:
What are you going to do in the next few days to take better care of yourself?
As a leader, what are you going to do with the people on your team in the coming days to promote their well-being and care?